Friday, January 2, 2009

putting colors together.

Why do I get so unimpressed when a nice dude seems interested in me romantically?
I don't really think of myself in a harsh way at all.
I'm confident in what I want in life and who I am, even if I might be a little crazy and wild here and there. I can admitt that. I don't have it all figured out. I'm a strong willed lady.
I have a very specific type I suppose.
I like really skinny guys that seem to be complex loners, have a drug problem, who is a complete drunk, and/or some other type of horrible habit/problem. I mean, ofcourse, I seem to find this out later on after I am involved. He has to be completely intense and ridiculously self depricating for me to like him. It' s pathetic of me, really.
Because, I'm not an asshole, I don't have a drug problem, but I am kinda a drunk but whatever. Who isn't at 21? I'm getting to be almost 22, I can hold my drink. Sometimes.
If a sweet, nice guy likes me, I look at them like they are out of their mind, crazy. I find it a complete turn off if good guys like me. I guess there is something wrong with me. Or it is just an extreme case of the bad boys. I want to like nice guys, but they are all so fucking boring. I shouldn't post this. It's too honest and a bit rude. Fuck it. It's the truth.

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